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The Grateful Dead
The Dead Non Stop New York City 1980

Album US on The Amazing Kornyfone Record Label label
Rock, Blues, Folk, World and (Blues Rock, Folk Rock)

There is no proof that this record was manufactured under the Amazing Kornyfone Record Label, besides the fact that the back side of the main record contains a whole story about the how records and how "The AMAZING KORNYFONE Record Label" came to existence, in addition to the LP Title and the track list at the bottom. It is possible that this is just part of an unofficial pressing. On the back side of the main sleeve, the following text is included (which is the story mentioned above), with decorations, of a rabbit dancing in the middle of a spinning record at the top, and a few other drawings: How It All Came To Be: It has taken over a century and one half of man's foremost technology to put this record you now hold onto and/or gaze upon within reach of your hands and/or your eyes. It was just before Veteran's Day 1822 when a lone inventor, scorned and cast aside from Fargo's electrical legion of cunnology in his native Kansas, mistakenly discovered a process that would indeed change the course of man's ears for years to come. While in the final stages of an experiment culminating an entire lifetime of study and research, Dr. Terrence H. "Telly" Fone proceeded with the last stage that would, at completion, offer the entire planet a two-dimensional tire incapable of going flat because of it's astounding lack of any width. In those bygone free energy days, a puncture-free tire offered the royal American citizen the inner comfort of a worryfree weekend on the interstate of their choice. (For further information of the eventual developement of the two-dimensional tire, see Amerikan scientifik review, August 1884) Before the addition of the final chemical agent that fateful day, a terrific explosion ripped through Terrence's pantry-turned-laboratory. When the smoke and his sinuses finally cleared, before him lay the end product of his decades of labor. It was not the two-dimensional tire he had dreamt of but rather a hard, round, black disc with a seemingly odd continuous engraving embedded in it. Terrence picked himself up from the floor and grasped the unknown by-product of his genius. In a semi-conscious state, he slowly placed this dark disc on a phonograph he luckily happened to find nearby. The huge three-way air-suspension speakers beneath him boomed forth very strange cantations indeed- "There'z A Ladee Whoze Shure Awl That Glitterz Iz Gold; And She'z Buying A Stareway Two Hevun" Terrence is shocked beyond belief. What are these strange noises and how did they find their way onto his plastic? Had all of these years of stalwart dedication amounted to mere gutteral rumblings? Remorsefully, he slid this forsaken platter between some paper and, attempting to disguise it, drew a picture of his grand parents, one holding a pitchfork, on top of the paper. Then he dropped this now-disguised mistake into a household size saran-wrap and placed it next to the fire he had built on the midst of his workbench. Able to withstand no more fright in a single evening, Terrence goes to his room to get summarily horizontal and unconscious. Upon arising later that evening in bed, Terrence realized he must rid himself of this mistake. It was around December by now so he put this horrid monstrosity in a gayly colored red and green wrapper and mailed it to his aunt Cornelia, whom he much not liked. Unbeknownst to Terrence though is the fact that over the years his aunt Cornelia has become the program director of a number one radio station. What happened next became history. Little did Terrence Fone know that science would step in and overnight transform his hideous error into the foremost entertainment medium of the 70's - both eighteenth and nineteenth. Terrence Fone is rocketed to godhood and into the hostship of his own syndicated television game show. (seen on most of these same stations) Man never had it so good and today gets it on the average of three times a week. Then finally in 1863, using his own and his aunt's name, Dr. Terrence H. "Telly" Fone, now a world respected rubberologist, founded the most biggest imaginary recording organization in the free known world - The Amazing Kornyfone Record Label. You now have the opportunity to own this fruit of his labor, if you promise not to smear it on your clothes. Boola boola. (-Picture in black and white-) (-The following text is the text underneath the picture-) Dr. Terrence H. "Telly" Fone is shown here still getting his personal touch even as he enters his one hundred and fifty-second year as titular head of FONOGRAM, his own faceless conglomerate. Still today Dr. Fone personally hand letters each and every label on every record issued by his totally imaginary company. Shown above he is just finishing the letter 'O' in the words 'SIDE TWO'. Dedicated man. The AMAZING KORNYFONE Record Label Ask for it by name Liner one of a slates

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The Grateful Dead , *1965 US album by

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